TMS

It's Monday, here's what's happening:

It is the end of July and like clockwork for the past 30+ late July's of my life I develop a severe case of TMS.

Too Much Sunshine.

Symptoms include:


unexplained anger; short-temperedness; debilitating fatigue; sudden onset road rage; crying jags; wild, uninhibited shopping sprees for items such as blackout curtains, awnings, beach umbrellas, dark sunglasses, ridiculously wide-brimmed hats, etc.; and plenty of alcohol for self-medication purposes.

I already hate the sun.  That's a year round thing for me.

Combine incessant, oppressive, glaring-through-my-soul sunshine with excessive heat and humidity and that's a perfect recipe for me to Find Comfort In The Fetal Position In The Darkest Corner Of My House. I have been known to becoming almost hysterical and melting down (no pun intended) in times of TMS when it hasn't rained in awhile. I have witnesses.  Ask my long-suffering husband and daughter.  Poor things.

I am a Summer SAD (Reverse Seasonal Affective Disorder) sufferer which is the opposite of the more well-known Winter SAD, for which sufferers get relief from increasing their sun exposure.  I need to decrease my sun exposure...drastically.  Right now what I really need is about a week of steady rain. Cloud cover.  Some Summer SAD people love cold and snow.  That's not me.  As the temperature steadily works its way toward the 100-degree mark as I write this, I am not wishing instead that there was a blizzard outside.  I like mild weather.  I like being outside.  I like not being encumbered by layers of clothing. I just hate the sun.

Check back with me in October.  This should pass by then.

 

Midsummer(ish) Update

Wait, is it really midsummer?
Technically it isn't.  In fact, summer isn't even a month old yet.  But summer to me runs from Memorial Day to Labor Day so mid-July is midsummer.

Anyway...
here we are at mid-July.  I've been in the house a lot, hiding from the sun since I break out if I spend longer than 5 minutes in sunshine.  Not minding being in the house, by the way, since I hate humidity and southern New Jersey has been thinking it's in the tropics lately.


We finally finished working on our swimming pool.  Hallelujah.
When we bought this house six months ago we knew the pool was 'as is'.  JP can basically fix anything and he saw that as a challenge.  I saw it as a money pit and I didn't care one way or another if we had a swimming pool or not.  Alas, he won that battle and went to work making the pool right.
Unfortunately for some really weird and unknown reason we couldn't get one iota of information from the former owners about the poor pool which made things all the more difficult.  Not sure while all the secrecy; we were already under contract before we even started asking questions about it.
People are weird.

We had to paint the pool.  Have you ever painted a pool?  I have and it's the direct opposite of fun.
Of course we painted the pool when it was hellishly hot out and I am not ashamed to admit that I did my share of pool painting in my underwear.  A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.  Thank God for privacy.

Here's what we started with:

You can see the stain marks that all had to be patched and repaired.  Funnnnnky!

And here's where we're at now:

Phew, it's done.  And while I am spending lots of time indoors, I do actually leave the house to swim in it and now there's a movable umbrella (not pictured) so I can sit under it from inside the pool and still be protected from the sun.  Our yard is super shady so the sun is only on the pool for a few hours in the afternoon anyway.  Perfect.

My little shop is doing really, really well!

We are selling a ton of stuff including JP's distressed furniture and my hand painted signs.

I have to say that it is really nice to be taking a break from the photo art for a little bit.  Switching gears is always a good idea when things get stale, right?  It's just a bit of a slowdown right now since I could never ever not create photo art.

Taking pictures in the summertime is weird and I think that's one of the reasons for the need to step away a little.  My stuff tends to have a stark look about it and all the trees and other green stuff of summer sort of conceal that beautiful rawness that I strive for.

This is really weird...I started to notice that a few of the people who were followers of my photo art - and in particular my Facebook page devoted to it - had some kind of expectation of me...or of a version of me that wasn't me at all.  It was like they thought I was some sort of Pollyanna who drove around the countryside in my gingham dress taking pictures of farm life.  I have to admit that I bought into that for awhile and it messed with me bad.  I would have these thoughts that I had to keep up their image of me so that I didn't lose them as followers.  Ridiculous, right?  For the record, I am pretty much the complete opposite of a Pollyanna.
For example:
Sometimes I curse on a regular basis.  I have tattoos and a pierced nose. I love wine, regularly. I dress in black every single day (not goth, just love black).  I'm a born and bred New Jerseyan and everybody knows that you would be hard pressed to find a Pollyanna in NJ.
I'm not two people. I'm one salty person who sees beauty in things that a lot of people overlook.  Yes, I drive around the countryside almost everyday with my cameras taking pictures of as much beauty as I can capture...and sometimes while I'm doing that I say
"%$*# you" to the person behind me who is tailgating me.
I've been a walking contradiction my whole life.
Not gonna hide that anymore.

 

For My Rain-Loving Compatriots

The weather people are extolling with greet glee that today will be a day
with "abundant sunshine".

They say this as if everyone within their listening or viewing range will fall to their knees in gratitude and joy upon hearing such a declaration.

Some of us know they are wrong. Not everyone is elated by abundant sunshine.  Some of us find it rather oppressive.

"Unfortunately", the weather people say, tomorrow will bring showers and possibly storms (completely ignoring the building drought situation in our region).
Sun days = fun days and that's what really matters.

Here are some resources and graphics for those of us who disagree:

"Rainy Day In The City" by Tom Shropshire
This painting basically captures what my perfect day looks like.

"9.Your level of creativity is directly related to the weather. Bright and sunny? Creative drought. Steady downpour of rain? Steady downpour of ideas."
21 Things Only People Who Prefer Rain Over All Other Weather Will Understand

What Is The Personality Type Of People Who Like Rain Very Much?
(Hint: It's not because we're depressed or have gothic tendencies)

City Data: Reverse SAD - Love Of Cloudy Days and Dislike Sunny Days

Harvard Business School: Blue Skies, Distractions Arise: How Weather Affects Productivity

7 Signs You're A Pluviophile

“Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops. Let the rain sing you a lullaby.” ― Langston Hughes

"Whenever it rains you will think of her.” ― Neil Gaiman 

I'm A Big Sell Out

So my new little shop has basically sold out. It took 10 days. We definitely didn't expect this.

Oh, there's still some little stuff there but a bunch of the other little stuff has sold and the big pieces of furniture have sold and I haven't been there since Sunday so I imagine it kind of looks like this except for the yellow hutch cabinet which sold and is no longer there:

Crazy.

Crazy great, that is!

Weekend Update

So happy to have had a 3-day weekend with JP.  So sad when it's over.
We spent the whole weekend home, doing home stuff.  Amazing how much fun that can be when you're with the right person. No joke; somehow even yard work is fun when I'm together with this guy.

Except when it comes to dealing with the swimming pool...aka the large gaping hole in the yard.


A little bit about our pool:



We knew when we bought the house six months ago that the in-ground pool was 'as is'.  Unfortunately the previous owners didn't really give us any information about what that meant and we still can't figure out why they drained all the water out of a 19,000 gallon pool, so we knew there would be challenges with it.  I said from the get-go that I couldn't care less about having an in-ground pool and wouldn't shed a single tear if we filled it in.  JP, on the other hand, saw/sees it as a challenge in some kind of testerone-induced battle cry and it has become his obsession priority.  This is where things become not so fun between us.  I see the pool as a gigantic money pit that will be used 3 months out of 12.
I am not a fan of money pits.
For years I had one of those Intex pools that cost a hundred bucks from WalMart and loved everything about them.  Cheap and easy.  If something went wrong with it or it sprung a leak you ran to WalMart and bought another one. No big deal, no big expense, no stress.  Somehow we have the exact opposite of all that going on. This weekend we spent hours figuring out what color to paint it. Then he told me how much it was going to cost to paint it and I had a fit ($1000+).  That's not including the cost of the water we'll have to have trucked in which should be about 3 loads ($1500?).
Did I mention the filter repairs?  That's a cost that is yet to be determined.  Aye yi yi.
Then while reading up on pool paint this weekend I learned that you're only supposed to paint a pool in early Spring or Fall.  Paint doesn't do well in heat and humidity.  Also, when you paint a pool you need 5 solid days of no rain.  Good luck with that.  So now it doesn't seem likely that the pool thing is going to happen this summer which I am perfectly okay with because...

WalMart Pool $59

While we were busy doing house and yard work this weekend and getting testy with each other about the pool, I did not do one single thing this past weekend for my new shop...which technically opens tomorrow, by the way!
Don't go there tomorrow, though, because all you'll find is a big empty 10x10 space.
Our lease starts June 1st but we're not going to be able to actually start putting the shop together until this weekend.  Thank God for that because I'm so not ready.
I imagine that the whole month of June is going to be like a soft opening for us as we work on inventory and setting things up.  By July we'd better have it more together!
Stay tuned as I post updates right here.  Wish us luck!

I did manage to squeeze in some website work this weekend.  I tweaked some of the tracking devices I have on the site and was amused to see that some people I know personally have visited my website even though they don't keep in touch with me.

 Hello friends who check out what I'm doing via my website but don't keep in touch with me!  Why not reach out and say hi?  I'd love to actually hear from you!  Let's catch up!



 

"I'm Too Old To Do Fun Things"...WHAT?!

I have been playing around with a whole bunch of new stuff.  We are soon opening a new little shop; I've been building a new website; I want to do more blog/podcast/video -ing.  Then there's the artwork, the sign painting, the other stuff I do that no one knows about.

I do not fit the demographic for some of the stuff that I do.  For instance, the blog/podcast/video (blogpodvid?) thing.  I l♥ve doing it.  I love the technology, the editing, adding the images and music.
It's a blast.
It's also the domain of people who are at least 20+ years younger than me.
All of these younger people are out there having the time of their life with all of this stuff.  Most of them are just documenting their lives and interests by way of video.  I subscribe to some of them (not the stupid ones) and they inspire me on a regular basis.



Which got me to wondering how many older people are doing this.  I searched for women my own age doing this sort of thing because I'd also like to be inspired by my peers...

I was so happy to find some.  So happy.  Better still, they all seem to have their own community where they support each other!  Imagine that: supportive community on the Internet!

We older people have so much to offer the world.  We have opinions based on real world experience not just what the status quo tells us we should regurgitate.  We have character and wisdom.  We can share what we know and we can do it with humor or more seriously.  We've been married and divorced, had careers, education, mortgages, hobbies, travesties, raised children, suffered losses, reveled in victories.  We've been defeated, praised, exhausted, discriminated against, sick, healthy, weird, lost, found, uptight, the opposite of uptight, hated, loved...and on and on it goes.

So why aren't we talking about it all?

Awhile ago a message popped into my head and through the years it keeps getting stronger and stronger and it's now my all-the-time mantra:  TELL YOUR STORY.

Please don't tell me that you don't have a story to tell.  There are people out there who think your story is far more fascinating than some stupid celebrity-type.  I love hearing about people's lives, the minutiae.  I would love for you to go for a walk around your town and take pictures of what you see (I am the type who would enjoy coming over to watch your home movies).  The view changes constantly and no one ever sees the same things no matter how much you walk the same path.

I've got this thing going on now and after some initial trepidation that I've gotten over I also have come to realize that it doesn't matter one single iota if no other person (besides my husband who encourages every weird thing I do except for when I say I want a dozen dogs) checks out what I do.  You do it for you.

Did you hear that?
You do it for you.  
You do it for you.
You do it for you.

(P.S.  I'm also doing it for my kid so that she doesn't live a life fearful of doing the things she wants to do because some anonymous someone somewhere might think it's weird.  Rule #1 for a happy life is not caring what anyone thinks about you.)

I want TELL YOUR STORY to become your mantra, too.  Start a blog or a YouTube/Vimeo channel or just go buy a damn notebook and some fun pens if you're not yet comfortable with going public!  Go out on picture-taking adventures and load them up to flickr with little paragraphs of where you were or why the place mattered to you.


 

JP Makes A Video!

Step Away From The News

It's been a newsworthy week and not one iota of it was remotely positive.

I used to be a news junkie and for the life of me I cannot explain why since I would wind up horrified and depressed.  And as someone with an anxiety disorder...well, I was just feeding the beast with my


news intake.  Now I steer clear of news to the best of my ability.  I unsubscribed from any site or page that was news-oriented or where news might seep in.  Of course none of those actions protect me 100% but even if I'm at 80-85% that is a healthy change.

Wise words on this from Thoreau:

Tip:  If you must have a news fix, better to read it than watch it.

Further Reading:
- Overcoming News Addiction: http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/09/overcoming-news-addiction/http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/09/overcoming-news-addiction/
- Dr. Andrew Weil on news fasting: http://www.drweil.com/drw/u/QAA401018/Need-a-News-Fast.html


 

Insomnia & Some Other Stuff

Periodically on a regular basis I go through a insomnia-ish thing which means that I fall asleep with no problem but I don't sleep as long as I should.  My inner alarm clock thinks that 5 hours is plenty of time to sleep and so since I tend to fall asleep between 10-11pm I will wake up at 3:30am or thereabouts and there is no getting back to sleep.
As a result I frequently have reallllly long days that are basically non-productive because one cannot create when one is an exhausted zombie.



It's all very frustrating and my mood can be very cranky whilst stuck in an insomnia flare-up.  Did I mention how much lack of sleep affects my pesky chronic pain?  Yeah, I am just a big ball of delight right now.  An impatient, reclusive, frustrated, hair-in-a-ponytail-no-makeup-sweatpants-and-tshirt-carb-craving ball of delight.

And there is so much to do.  So so much to do.  There are pictures to be taken, photo art to be created, signs to be painted, website to be worked on, house to be cleaned, walks and bike rides to be taken, fun to be had, etc.

I have no energy for any of it.  Coffee doesn't help except to make me a jittery exhausted person who can't go back to sleep because I try to use caffeine to battle the crippling fatigue which never works and I should know better but I keep doing it anyhow.


via GIPHY

Yesterday on the Internet someone wrote that something was a "fig mint" of their imagination.  I'm tired and it annoyed me.  Fig mint! 

That's it for now.  I'll write more after I've had  a nap.


 

A Simple Hello

The other day JP and I were returning home from a Craigslist excursion*.  As we approached our house we saw a woman with some kids and a dog stop in front of our house to let us pass by. She had no way of knowing that we were not going to pass her but instead were going to back into our driveway which was maybe 20 feet from where she had stopped to wait.
As we were backing in I waved to her.  We're new here in this close-knit neighborhood that we've only lived in for 3 months and of course we're wanting to be nice and know our neighbors.  We wave and say hello to everyone, we are neighborly like that.  "Hi neighbor, nice to meet you, come by for a glass of wine or a swim in our pool when the weather gets nice!"  That's us.


So she is kind of fussing with the dog or the kids but is looking up toward us.  I wave, she sees me waves and she clearly ignores me.  No smile, no nod, no mouthing a hello.  Nada.
What the hell, right?
I don't do well with being ignored particularly when I am being friendly and/or it is blatant so of course I wait until I catch her eye again and wave one more time.  Because I'm bitchy friendly like that.
Now she's caught and she knows it so does this really curt wave while doing that thing people do when someone keeps doing something and you're like "yes, okay, I see you, okay?".  You know, that sort of annoyed thing complete with the roll of the eyes.


via GIPHY

I have annoyed her with my insistence on being friendly.

I'll just let that sink in for a minute.

Afterward I am annoyed by her unwillingness to be friendly to us and I express this to JP, eventually telling him that what I should have done is to have said to her "sorry, just trying to be friendly."
This frightens him as I am wont to call people out for their bad behavior and he doesn't want us to be thought of as the cranky new neighbors.  He was concerned that if I had said that to her that she might have mentioned it to other neighbors in a "do you know what the new people said to me" way.
I, on the other hand, could not care less what she said to who...especially since she would have to out herself as someone who couldn't bother to say a simple hello to her own neighbors.  "Do you know what the new people said to me...when they smiled at me and my kids and waved hello and I completely ignored them?"  She couldn't tell the story and leave that part out.

What has happened to people that it has become too hard for them to say or indicate by way of a gesture (nod, smile) a friendly greeting to a neighbor?

Coincidentally, I read this article in the Wall Street Journal just this morning.  In it, the author talks about the French expression simple comme bonjour: simple as hello.

"...bonjour is an acknowledgement of your interlocutor, a nod to your coexistence. Omitting it isn’t just rude, it’s a refusal to see the other as an equal."

Saying hello to people you encounter isn't just good manners, it's almost your duty as a human being to acknowledge other human beings.  Not doing so only acknowledges that you somehow think you are superior to those you encounter...and ignore.  Obviously I am not suggesting that you run around tapping people on the shoulder to get their attention the next time you are at the grocery store just to say hello to them, but if you are anywhere and eye contact is made...than, yes, you greet that person with a hello, a smile, a nod.

It's the human - and neighborly - thing to do.

Do you know that something that simple can make a real difference to someone?

A hello is probably the easiest small kindness you can offer.
And kindness always (always always!) matters.

Further reading:
The Power Of Hello
Beyond The Classroom: The Power Of Saying Hello



*Craigslist excursion: journey of varying length in which we endeavor to procure an item at a greatly reduced cost that someone else no longer wants in order to fill our home with items that we in turn will some day sell on Craigslist.